Word of the Year

This isn’t really a thing I do, but I’ve chosen a word for the year of 2018. Yesterday I met with our team to make plans and develop strategies for the year for the theatre. And it hit me that I would really benefit from doing that kind of introspection and planning for my own life. There were a lot of themes running through my mind of how I want this year to be different; I want to be stronger, organized, joyful. The word that came to me was:

REJUVENATE 1) to make young again; restore to youthful vigor, appearance, etc. 2) to restore to a former state; make fresh or new again 3) to renew the activity, erosive power, etc. of a stream by uplift or by removal of a barrier in the stream bed; to impress again the characters of youthful topography on a region by the action of rejuvenated streams

The word had more powerful and vivid inagery than I even expected as I chose it. And as I wrote and brainstormed, I was given the gift of silly, joyful, and loving moments from my son, and it inspired to pursue “youthful vigor,” so to speak, in a way that’s different than our culture would normally dictate. It’s not about reducing wrinkles or preventing grey hairs or fitting into the clothes you wore in high school. Youth as it is expressed in my child means being joyful, unscathed by cynicism, curious, unafraid of taking risks, impressed by simple everyday pleasures, celebratory in all victories, and relentlessly energetic.

I have multiple areas of my life where I’ve desired growth—rejuvenation, if you will—for years but seemingly to no avail. But this year feels different. And it’s different because I’ve decided it’s going to be different. I started listening to Jon Acuff’s Finish again today. The thesis of this book is that the reason we get caught in a trap of starting things and not finishing is because we are perfectionists. We either don’t start something at all because we’re afraid to fail, or we stop as soon as our perfect streak ends. The way we accomplish goals is to keep going and keep doing the “day after perfect,” the day after we broke the perfect streak, the day after it stopped looking like exactly what we envisioned at all times. So this year I am going to accomplish goals not because I’m perfect but because I’ve committed to keep going and keep doing even when I don’t do it perfectly.

I have certain goals for the whole year that I would like to share so that you can see how they relate to my word, rejuvenate. These are goals that aren’t going to be finalized by 2019 but that I hope to see real growth in before I turn 30.
1) hydrate: literally and spiritually. I do not drink enough water, and I do not spend enough time in prayer and reading the words of Jesus. And when I say “enough time” I don’t mean there’s a checklist of how many minutes per day. I mean that my heart and soul are parched because all too often it is a last resort or a second thought or only a product of crisis. Kind of like when you only drink water when you’ve got a headache and you realize it might be because you’re dehydrated—but you probably had a cup of coffee first because you always assume it’s caffeine instead of just your basic daily need of water.
2) organize. My house is a mess. It’s never been fully functional, and it stresses me out. I need systems that are managable and mean I spend less time cleaning and more time being at home. I also need to get rid of clutter that I’ve either been too sentimental or too lazy or too busy to do anything about. I am 100% positive that are boxes in the garage that have never been touched since we moved in over two years ago. My brain itself also needs better organization. Better routines. Better systems for papers, bills, etc. so that I don’t have extra anxiety of where’s that important document on top of my general anxiety. In addition to our physical lives being a mess, our financial lives are in a mess, and organizing and planning is the first step in getting more financially stable.
3) strengthen: physically and mentally. I see people on instagram, etc. doing crazy strength or flexibility exercises, and I’m prone to think that I could never do it. But my body is capable of being strong and being flexible. I am not a lost cause, but my perfectionism makes me terrified to try because what if I can’t? (Here comes back the doing and doing and doing again.) I really want to lose weight as well. There’s a plethora of reasons that have to do with insecurities, but it’s also that I really want to value health and I want my body to function better and I want to teach my kids by example how to care for the gift of a body. I also want to strengthen myself in creative and intellectual ways, reading and writing more than I am and reacquanting myself with old hobbies and interests that I’ve lost time and energy for over the years.

In the spirit of rejuvenating, hydrating, organizing and strengthening: I’ve decided on a habit or resolution that I want to commit to each month. In the past I’ve always seen the new year as a time to do ALL the things you want to see differently in your life, but I realize now how idiotic that is. I’ve quoted him before and I’m doing it again: as Daniel Tiger says, “If something seems hard to do, try it a little bit at a time.” So here are my monthly focuses for the year:
JANUARY: whole30
FEBRUARY: yoga/walk everyday
MARCH: tech free afternoon or evening everyday where we make a craft or play a game with Nate
APRIL: read nonfiction everyday
MAY: write something everyday
JUNE: color everyday
JULY: do a strengthening exercise daily
AUGUST: whole30
SEPTEMBER: clean a drawer/shelf daily
OCTOBER: use 30 new recipes
NOVEMBER: send daily notes of encouragement
DECEMBER: advent calendar/readings with family

As I was brainstorming for the year, there were a lot of other things on my list like keeping laundry caught up, keep car clean, read all the plays on my bookshelf, complete one house project a month, etc. And those are all things I want to do. But I also need to focus on managing the expectations I’ve put on myself. So although I want a great organized house and stable finances and athletic body and...for now I am doing whole30. And if I do more in the month of January? Awesome. But if not. Awesome. Because it’s about building habits by committing to building habits not about being the perfect person you decided to be all at once.